Spontaneous Make-outs Keep Flame Alive: Morgan Tincher

Morgan Tincher, Entrepreneur, Married to Kimberlee with 8 month twins

What is love to you?

Love is intrinsic. It’s a feeling that overcomes you. While love is the fundamental building block of a relationship, it doesn’t manage it all. For Kim and me, we’ve encountered challenging situations where we don’t see eye to eye. But regardless of the disagreement or heated moment, I can always say that I love her.

What is challenging in your relationship?

Kim is an amazing communicator, but me…not so much. A lot of our battles come from me not communicating clearly or making assumptions about information that I think she already has or doesn’t require. Whether it’s about the kids, plans or a dinner party, I’ve learned that the more detailed communication about everything that is happening leaves less room for error. I’m constantly working on this one.

You two dated for 6½ years before proposing, what made you decide to pop the question?

Life comes at you and the 6 years just flew by. I wasn’t in hurry. I am someone that defies convention a lot in my life. Marriage in the traditional sense was not a priority. My relationship with Kim and being fully present was. When we purchased our first place together, and got a dog, it was then that marriage seemed like a natural step.

When did you know?

Right when I met her, I knew I wanted to get to know her more. As we started to date, I could imagine ultimately spending the rest of my life with her. She was only 22 when I met her and it’s been such a cool journey watching Kim become a woman. I couldn’t predict with precision how she would blossom but I had a sense of who she was and where she was going…even when she couldn’t see it. I feel privileged that I have been a part of her growth as both an enthusiastic fan on the sidelines and a teammate.

What made her different from the other women you dated?

Kim represented a great balance of passion, strength and stability. Coming from a volatile relationship I knew that I wanted a partner who could endure the good and the bad times. Love and passion are both amazing pillars of a strong relationship, but they alone do not keep a partnership evolving vibrantly.

Who is the alpha between you two?

I’ll say I’m the alpha, while there are many instances where she exerts the alpha position and I take a back seat. She is very organized and scheduled; two things I am not. She keeps us on track and I tend to look to her for that…sometimes to her dismay.

Who pursued whom?

I definitely pursued her. She was a tough one, but I was fortunate in finding the right words and actions that ultimately wooed her.

What do you love about her the most?

While a thousand things come to mind, I love her authenticity.

How do you keep balance now that you have two baby girls?

It is like anything that’s worthwhile that you go after – you have to work at it. You can’t just let it happen. Sometimes we stumble by getting caught up with life and kids and our romance inadvertently takes a back seat. Life is much like a sailboat on journey from one port to another. It’s never a straight line from A to B. It’s tacking, maneuvering back and forth to manage what comes at you. While we sometimes drift off course, we find our way back because we remind each other to do that.

How do you keep the passion alive? 

We do special things for each other not only on holidays and birthdays. I leave little notes, surprise her, get her flowers just because, and sometimes I’ll just go in for a spontaneous make out session. All these little things make a difference. Oh, and massages are a big one. I should be doing those more often. Wink, wink.

What is something you will tell your daughters when they grow up?

Never compromise your values, believe in yourself and if someone doesn’t match with that, then move on. Particularly when I was younger, I noticed some girls sexually objectifying themselves for male approval and I always struggled with that.

What about if you had a son?

If I can convince Kim to try again (chuckle), I would tell my son, “Go after who and what you want, but do it with respect and integrity.”

Last words of wisdom?

If you want something, you have to work for it. This applies to a successful career just as much as it does to an impassioned relationship. Don’t think that a false sense of entitlement will get you what you want. Cultivate the right environment to enable the things you want to happen.

To read Kimberlee’s interview, click here.